Category Archives: Wisdom

Yoga Practice: Being Durable and Vulnerable

5.2 Parsvottanasana_Adjustment 1

As a blogger ensconced in my little Mitchells Island retreat, I walk a thin line between being open and revealing in my writing but not so much that I come across as neurotic and narcissistic.

Really, I do rein myself in at times. Also, I don’t want you to lose confidence in me because of not being the epitome of a strong, well-balanced yoga teacher (which I’m not, certainly not at all times…ask my husband). But, teaching is where I derive my much of my public recognition, so I want to keep up at least a semblance of looking good.

Nevertheless, I’m feeling a little unbalanced by the number of people who are showing up in my classes with injuries. I think the fact that I draw on a rural population of people who are tradesmen, surfers, or who are working on properties (farming, gardening, renovating) is fertile ground for injuries to occur. Also, in my demographic, I have mature-age students, mothers getting back into exercise after babies, 60 and 70-year olds – groups who might have been ignoring their bodies for some time.

Each person’s needs are different. To get the most out of the healing properties of yoga, ideally, an individual would have their own practice to follow. This is virtually impossible to do in a group situation.

I try to keep in mind the real aim of yoga is to rest in a frame of mind that is as still as a mountain lake on a windless day. It helps me find this stillness when I acknowledge that I am vulnerable as well as durable, that I don’t know everything but I do have many yoga experiences to draw on, and that what I share is often valuable.

If people come to my classes and feel better on the inside for having hung out in the Yoga Shed for awhile, that makes me happy, and sometimes it’s plenty enough in the absence of miraculous physical cures.

Yoga works… sometimes in mysterious ways, and at the same time, on many levels: physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, and communal. We just have to hang in there practising with patience and sensitivity, especially when we’re injured or ill.

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Cultivating Pure Awareness – The Aim of Yoga

jetty

I started off my day listening to a mindfulness meditation recorded by Jon Kabat-Zinn. The time I put aside in the early morning is special because I meditate with my husband. The practice is good for me, and I think it is good for us.

The theme of the meditation this morning was choiceless awareness. This is an orientation in meditation where you open your mind to all experience within your field of awareness – letting it be as big as the sky – so it can contain everything: the soundscape, your breath, your body sensations, thinking and feeling.

The spirit is one of allowing and what Kabat-Zinn calls the ‘nowscape’.

This is a particularly good sort of meditation for me because I’ve set as a goal for myself to pay attention to my reactivity – those times, for instance, when I have a quick retort that I might regret afterwards, or the strong aversions or passions I seem to have no control over, or the occasions when I feel a need to be competitive or self-righteous.

These are areas where I feel I trip myself up. Meditation gives me some practice in making space around thoughts, feelings, behaviours. I can see there are times when nothing needs to be said or done.

I came across a Yoga Lunchbox post today from Kara-Leah Grant on the yoga concept of isvara pranidhana, which seemed to dovetail with my morning meditation. The author did a great job of defining and de-mystifying the notion of ‘surrender to god’, which is how isvara pranidhana is usually translated. Rather than bringing in the sometimes controversial idea of God, Grant says that what we surrender to is Pure Awareness:

In a concrete way, this surrender often means taking a moment to allow a moment to truly penetrate my being. I watch as thoughts or feelings might arise in reaction to the moment. I see those thoughts and feelings but I don’t allow them to generate an action. Instead, I pause, until the clarity of Awareness infuses my being and allow action to arise from that place.

It’s a practice.

It takes time.

And, I can see that it’s a practice that’s a worthy use of our time as mindfulness practice can spill over into every aspect of our lives.

 

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It’s All Yoga Practice: Disappointment vs. Depression

 

Misty morning on Mitchells Island

Misty morning on Mitchells Island

I came back five days early from an aborted holiday up north, defeated by fairly continuous rain. Daniel and I were going to venture into a camping adventure on Fraser Island, Queensland – a magnificent World Heritage site. But roughing it in the wet is not my idea of fun, so we cancelled.

Maybe it was a combination of not having my plans realised, the unpleasant weather, and my husband suffering from a man-cold, but I fell into a foul mood  that stuck around for a few days upon returning home.

I heard a comedian say that the difference between disappointment and depression is your level of commitment. I think that’s supposed to mean that you can actually get yourself out of a situation where you’re feeling let down, but that depression is a state where you tend to get mired.

I live in a beautiful rural paradise in a lovely home surrounded by wildlife, bush and gardens. I should have been happy to come home to such a comfortable environment, but I didn’t feel satisfied. I was still clinging to the thought of what a perfect holiday would have been like.

There was one more thing that happened in my sad saga: I became disappointed in myself for not being able to shake off my malaise. You could say that going down this line of thinking is one step lower on the scale of lowness.

Do you sometimes wish you were better at life than you are? Obviously, I do. I’ve done all this yoga practice for umpteen years and here I am with all my humanity intact.

What finally got me out of my disgruntlement was that I became less committed to listening to a conversation in my head about how things weren’t working than to noticing how they were – including how it’s just fine to be human.

Obviously the idea of being human is a very human idea. - Dominic Monaghan

 

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Context for Yoga Teaching

After I completed two long days of teaching yoga therapy in Byron Bay, I had pause to stop and reflect on my efforts.

The night before my 14-hour teaching day, I typically had sleep difficulties, culminating in just three hours of sleep. It’s not the first time this sort of pre-teaching insomnia has occurred. Part of it has to do with what a quiet lifestyle I ordinarily have in the country contrasted with suddenly meeting 13 new students in a new venue. But I also admit to being somewhat of a perfectionist, still, after all these years. Maybe, like my American accent, I’m stuck with my attitude.

In any case, I believe this year’s crop of yoga therapy students had a good time. Any of my pre-course nerves were allayed when I dived into teaching and interacting with them.

One thing I’ve learned by now, after teaching in this particular course now for five years, is the importance of context.

What is context? I’ve heard it explained as the container that holds something – like the bowl that holds the fruit.

At the risk of being puffed up, I know a lot of stuff about the subject of yoga. In teaching yoga therapy to people who don’t have a lot of experience, I have to put all this knowledge through a funnel to give my audience the right amount of what’s useful. But, it’s the context that is most important element, i.e.: What is yoga? Why are we teaching the student or client the particular program we create? Who is this person anyway? What do we want to achieve together?

The truth is I’m still learning. Each time the teacher meets the student, the best thing that they can bring to the relationship is their presence. In that sense and to some extent, there will always be learning because, if student and teacher are in the moment, it’s a new exchange.

And perhaps that’s the very basis of a healing relationship.

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Guts

guts

Am I a bad yoga teacher? Sometimes I think it’s just stupid to be teaching triangle pose to a student who has a physical complaint that’s causing them mental distress.

Sometimes I just want to say, Whoa, let’s just sit down for a minute and see what’s up. In this moment, what’s going on? Instead of glossing over what appears to be a strong feeling or a difficult attitude.

What’s the point of doing a lateral stretch when someone’s dog just died or they’re in pain in their body or they’ve been depressed for some time. Even if it’s an exceptionally well performed triangle pose, maybe it wasn’t be best thing in that moment. Maybe the student just needed to be held or to speak what was on their mind.

Is that capitulating? Would the perfectly executed triangle pose have indirect healing properties? Better than talking or touching? What would Mr. B.K.S. Iyengar do? Or, A.G. Mohan? Or, Shiva Rhea?

They might just trust their guts. Yes, I think that’s what they would do.

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Persistent, Pushy or Plucky?

Eve @ Burning Man Festival

Eve @ Burning Man Festival

Why do people try to keep it together? And, sometimes they have to work very hard at it, too.

I do it myself. I was reminiscing tonight about how I took up bicycle riding again eight months after I’d had hip replacement surgery. I hadn’t ridden a bike for 20 years. I was using the bike at the Burning Man Festival, covering miles of desert on and off over several days. After the first day out, by the time I returned to my tent, I broke down in tears from the effort of being tenacious (even after having fallen off the bike a few times).

I was thinking about this episode in relation to students who come to class with injuries and think or hope that the yoga asanas will help them. Maybe it will, but I’m not a medico or even a certified yoga therapist, so what I have to offer has limitations.

I don’t understand the mentality of toughing it out, even having said that I do it. I know that, even though I felt wrung out from my bicycling escapades, I also felt proud of myself for my courage and persistence.

Are any of these yoga attitudes? Are they even me? When does perseverance turn into pushiness? When does stick-to-it-ive-ness become stubbornness?

You teach what you most need to learn. - Old saying

 

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Practice is not about being perfect. It’s about being you.

matKathy Cooper Yoga Mats via Pinterest

I’ve uncovered a new offence that I’m capable of. I’m calling it creation-envy. What occurs for me when I hear of a great idea or turn of phrase is that I find myself wishing I’d thought of it or said it first.

Occasionally, I’ll hear another yoga teacher say something in class that is so perfectly verbalised that I just have to ‘borrow’ it. I think that Jon Kabat-Zinn of the Center for Mindfulness in Medicine speaks like an angel on his meditation recordings, and his words drop right into my heart, completely bypassing my head.

Today I came across an excerpt from a book called Teaching People, Not Poses: 12 Principles for Teaching Yoga With Integrity. The author, Jay Fields, sums up the way I aspire to teach so succinctly and well that I wished I’d written the book.

Interestingly, Jay says that other people than yoga teachers are finding her book useful. Well, why wouldn’t they? Yoga students would think words like these are reassuring:

Practice is not about being perfect. It’s about being yourself. It’s about getting past your lines of defense to find the soft, chewy, sweet center.

Almost as much as I love teaching and practising yoga, I love inspiring students to do home practice.

My spirit soars when I hear that someone has become turned on enough to buy a yoga mat, remembered the postures they’ve learned in class, and even begun to bend the practices so that they make a good fit for their individual lifestyle.

Some people are discouraged from doing home practice because they feel they don’t know enough. But even knowing a little and applying it is helpful because the truth is that there will be never be an end to learning more about yoga.

If you don’t have a deep groove of yoga practice established as yet, just be kind to yourself, and keep coming back to your mat when you can.

It helps to remember the magic moments that yoga practice creates, whether you’re in classes or at home. When you tap into these experiences, you become more and more enrolled in doing practice – even when you’ve been doing it for years.

If you are a somewhat diffident practitioner or a beginner, we’ve created the YogaAnywhere practice sets to provide a basic, but structured guide on how to do 10 or 20 initial poses, plus suggestions and encouragement along the way. They were created to inspire people to get started – and to keep going. You’ll never know where you’ll end up :)

 

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Decisions, Decisions, Decisions

decisions(via Pinterest) 

Having just completed teaching one workshop, I’m now mentally preparing for teaching in the Yoga Therapy Intensive in Byron Bay.

However, I’m following my own advice to the driven, stressed-out people who take up yoga to relax: chill a little. You may have had the experience of being so intensely productive that you use up all your reserves and end up flat on your back, unable to do anything.

So, for the time being I’m dawdling. My desk needs tidying, documents require filing, and emails demand answering, but I’m looking the other way.

I find it’s hard to sit down and evaluate, out of many tasks that are yelling out for my attention, exactly which ones are most important.

In fact, the decision-making process regarding anything we do can be headache inducing. I remember going into huge American supermarkets and feeling paralysed by trying to choose among the plethora of products – 20 different kinds of toothpaste or 15 types of yoghurt. Do I want whiteners, brighteners or lighteners? Do I want fat-free, probiotic, or Greek-style?

One of the reasons that yoga retreats are popular is that you don’t have to make any decisions. You walk through the door and put yourself into the caterer’s and teacher’s competent hands for the weekend, and you just trust that what they choose for you is what you want.

We often think of discipline as burdensome, but one of the big plusses of having regular routines is that we can just slot into a groove. My mind doesn’t have to choose my early morning activity: discipline chooses for me. I’m in the Yoga Shed most mornings between 7:30-9 am for practice.

Now, if I only had a regimen for keeping my desk clean :)

Here’s a great link on the subject of decision fatigue.

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“Good at Any Age”

 

Tao Porchon-Lynch at 94

Tao Porchon-Lynch at 94

I hope you will allow me a little whinge. I’ve been keeping it to myself for a while but I think it’s about time now to vent a bit.

This is my complaint: I’m tired of the media image of yoga that shows youngish, pretty women (and sometimes attractive youthful men) doing advanced poses in designer clothing.

There. It’s out. Now you know that I can be a judgmental person.

Actually, now that I’m freely expressing, I just realised that it’s not that I resent the young people looking good on Yoga Journal calendars, magazine covers and YouTube videos; it’s just that I find older folks (like me) are underrepresented in the media. I crave seeing images of people of advanced age – and I know there are a lot of them out there – doing yoga.

One benefit of representing aged people in yoga media is that it would give more old folks the space to take up yoga. They might realise that yoga really is for everyone, and they would get the opportunity to experience improvements in all the areas in which yoga excels: flexibility, strength, posture, mental balance and relaxation, to name a few.

For those who are long-term practitioners (like me), our practice would demonstrate how well yoga contributes to health and well-being when it is made a life-long companion. And, I imagine this would be encouraging to young and old alike.

Maybe things are shifting. The Boomer Yogis are making their presence felt. Ultimately though, we know yoga isn’t about photos and film. It’s an individual, inward journey that reveals our true nature.

Still, it’s inspiring words and beautiful images in our culture that often get people onto their mats or meditation cushions, so let’s just get everyone there.

 

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Mother’s Day on Kangaroo Island

We’ve just celebrated Mother’s Day this last Sunday, and I believe it was for me one of the most satisfying I’ve experienced.

First of all, I was on Kangaroo Island, spending 4 days in the company of 6 other women who are known for their wisdom, spunkiness and joie de vie. Our ages range from 40′s to late 70′s, so there are grandmothers and grandmothers-to-be in the mix.

Secondly, we women like to set up meaningful rituals, and on this Mother’s Day occasion, sitting around after dinner, we each shared about our mothers. I learned a lot about my friends from how they described their mothers’ lives. For instance, the freedoms we now enjoy were not something to be taken for granted in the last generation. Our mothers did battle for them.

Another thing I saw as I talked about my own mother was how much more compassion and appreciation I have for her from my vantage point of 67 years than I ever did when she was alive. (She died relatively young – just 53.)

Last of all, our Mother’s Day ritual was all the more poignant because, for the first time, we had a young man along on our annual women’s retreat. He’s a handsome 19-year old, who has been experiencing difficulties in his life, for which his mother felt a strong intervention was necessary.

Richard was invited to our table to speak about his mother (seated next to him), which he did with great love and admiration. I could imagine he was speaking on behalf of all sons and daughters anywhere who might speak lovingly of  their mothers.

We asked Richard to sit with us a little longer when he finished to let each of us address the best in him and say the possibilities we saw in him. He listened carefully to our short speeches and did so with dignity and grace. Can you imagine yourself as a teenager hearing and letting in the well-cured love of a host of women you’d known for years and respected. Only a special young person would have the capacity for this sort of  experience.

I think Richard will now go back into his life having been positively contributed to by us. Hopefully he knows  what a gift his presence and receptivity  has been to us. After all, it’s what mothers live for.

Richard

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