A strange thing happened this morning, a disturbing thing for me.
Yesterday we had a house guest who was travelling north to Queensland and wanted accommodation overnight. After her arrival, we shared a meal, chatted, and then I set her up in a comfy bed. I suggested breakfast and a beach walk the next morning before she had to continue her drive.
After my early morning yoga practice, I headed off to make breakfast for us and discovered a good-by letter from our guest on the kitchen bench top. She’d left with no explanation and nothing more than a farewell note. “Paper hugs”, she’d said.
Before I could get a grip on my internal chatter, I thought of any number of ways that I might have offended her (mind you, I had to make some these up). In the end, just to get some closure for myself, since my friend wasn’t going to be available by phone, I fired off an email presenting my concerns. I’ll be very curious what caused her hurried departure, if I do hear from her.
The really interesting part of this process is the way I reacted. I admit to an overactive sense of responsibility at times. And in this instance, I was attached to being a good hostess, as well as expecting a certain way that my friend was supposed to receive my hospitality. Her behaviour may have had absolutely nothing to do with me. But, that’s not where my mind went.
The Wise One, Patanjali, has said:
drsta-anusravika-visaya-vitrsnasya vasikara-samjna vairagym
Renunciation is the practice of detachment from desires.*
What does this tell you? I have a long way to go!
*Light on the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali, B.K.S. Iyengar