Yoga Practice: Being Durable and Vulnerable

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As a blogger ensconced in my little Mitchells Island retreat, I walk a thin line between being open and revealing in my writing but not so much that I come across as neurotic and narcissistic.

Really, I do rein myself in at times. Also, I don’t want you to lose confidence in me because of not being the epitome of a strong, well-balanced yoga teacher (which I’m not, certainly not at all times…ask my husband). But, teaching is where I derive my much of my public recognition, so I want to keep up at least a semblance of looking good.

Nevertheless, I’m feeling a little unbalanced by the number of people who are showing up in my classes with injuries. I think the fact that I draw on a rural population of people who are tradesmen, surfers, or who are working on properties (farming, gardening, renovating) is fertile ground for injuries to occur. Also, in my demographic, I have mature-age students, mothers getting back into exercise after babies, 60 and 70-year olds – groups who might have been ignoring their bodies for some time.

Each person’s needs are different. To get the most out of the healing properties of yoga, ideally, an individual would have their own practice to follow. This is virtually impossible to do in a group situation.

I try to keep in mind the real aim of yoga is to rest in a frame of mind that is as still as a mountain lake on a windless day. It helps me find this stillness when I acknowledge that I am vulnerable as well as durable, that I don’t know everything but I do have many yoga experiences to draw on, and that what I share is often valuable.

If people come to my classes and feel better on the inside for having hung out in the Yoga Shed for awhile, that makes me happy, and sometimes it’s plenty enough in the absence of miraculous physical cures.

Yoga works… sometimes in mysterious ways, and at the same time, on many levels: physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, and communal. We just have to hang in there practising with patience and sensitivity, especially when we’re injured or ill.

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Cultivating Pure Awareness – The Aim of Yoga

jetty

I started off my day listening to a mindfulness meditation recorded by Jon Kabat-Zinn. The time I put aside in the early morning is special because I meditate with my husband. The practice is good for me, and I think it is good for us.

The theme of the meditation this morning was choiceless awareness. This is an orientation in meditation where you open your mind to all experience within your field of awareness – letting it be as big as the sky – so it can contain everything: the soundscape, your breath, your body sensations, thinking and feeling.

The spirit is one of allowing and what Kabat-Zinn calls the ‘nowscape’.

This is a particularly good sort of meditation for me because I’ve set as a goal for myself to pay attention to my reactivity – those times, for instance, when I have a quick retort that I might regret afterwards, or the strong aversions or passions I seem to have no control over, or the occasions when I feel a need to be competitive or self-righteous.

These are areas where I feel I trip myself up. Meditation gives me some practice in making space around thoughts, feelings, behaviours. I can see there are times when nothing needs to be said or done.

I came across a Yoga Lunchbox post today from Kara-Leah Grant on the yoga concept of isvara pranidhana, which seemed to dovetail with my morning meditation. The author did a great job of defining and de-mystifying the notion of ‘surrender to god’, which is how isvara pranidhana is usually translated. Rather than bringing in the sometimes controversial idea of God, Grant says that what we surrender to is Pure Awareness:

In a concrete way, this surrender often means taking a moment to allow a moment to truly penetrate my being. I watch as thoughts or feelings might arise in reaction to the moment. I see those thoughts and feelings but I don’t allow them to generate an action. Instead, I pause, until the clarity of Awareness infuses my being and allow action to arise from that place.

It’s a practice.

It takes time.

And, I can see that it’s a practice that’s a worthy use of our time as mindfulness practice can spill over into every aspect of our lives.

 

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It’s All Yoga Practice: Disappointment vs. Depression

 

Misty morning on Mitchells Island

Misty morning on Mitchells Island

I came back five days early from an aborted holiday up north, defeated by fairly continuous rain. Daniel and I were going to venture into a camping adventure on Fraser Island, Queensland – a magnificent World Heritage site. But roughing it in the wet is not my idea of fun, so we cancelled.

Maybe it was a combination of not having my plans realised, the unpleasant weather, and my husband suffering from a man-cold, but I fell into a foul mood  that stuck around for a few days upon returning home.

I heard a comedian say that the difference between disappointment and depression is your level of commitment. I think that’s supposed to mean that you can actually get yourself out of a situation where you’re feeling let down, but that depression is a state where you tend to get mired.

I live in a beautiful rural paradise in a lovely home surrounded by wildlife, bush and gardens. I should have been happy to come home to such a comfortable environment, but I didn’t feel satisfied. I was still clinging to the thought of what a perfect holiday would have been like.

There was one more thing that happened in my sad saga: I became disappointed in myself for not being able to shake off my malaise. You could say that going down this line of thinking is one step lower on the scale of lowness.

Do you sometimes wish you were better at life than you are? Obviously, I do. I’ve done all this yoga practice for umpteen years and here I am with all my humanity intact.

What finally got me out of my disgruntlement was that I became less committed to listening to a conversation in my head about how things weren’t working than to noticing how they were – including how it’s just fine to be human.

Obviously the idea of being human is a very human idea. - Dominic Monaghan

 

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Time Out or Time In?

I’ve been enjoying a break from our routine life on Mitchell’s Island this week, visiting such varied places as Uki, inner city Brisbane, and Sunshine Beach, Queensland. I’ve also had downtime from sitting at my computer, and as a result had some insights.

Out of necessity from being on the road, I’ve begun disconnecting from some of the social media and blog sites that send me regular updates through my email.

I hear people say that they don’t have time to keep up with the plethora of information, advice, marketing and entertainment that shows up in their inbox. I understand that.

But time isn’t the real problem for me. It’s the feeling I’ve been getting that I’m losing myself in cyberness – in a virtual reality that is eroding the time and space I use for real experiences. You know… stuff like walking on the beach, cooking a meal, weeding garden beds, talking on the phone, making love, swimming, debating issues, playing parlour games, meditating, sharing a cuppa.

I don’t have to compromise on the above activities, but I find the Internet pulls on my attention, and without being conscious of it, I drift into a sort of mesmerising time warp.

I realise how ironic what I’m saying is in that I identify as a blogger and I’ve been doing it, mostly enjoyably, for years. I have an audience and I don’t want to lose any of you. But I don’t want to lose me either – the physical, substantial, practical me. The living breathing me for whom sitting at my computer can be an out-of-body experience.

Time to evaluate whether the time on my Mac and iPhone are worth the time out of friendships, family and nature.

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Context for Yoga Teaching

After I completed two long days of teaching yoga therapy in Byron Bay, I had pause to stop and reflect on my efforts.

The night before my 14-hour teaching day, I typically had sleep difficulties, culminating in just three hours of sleep. It’s not the first time this sort of pre-teaching insomnia has occurred. Part of it has to do with what a quiet lifestyle I ordinarily have in the country contrasted with suddenly meeting 13 new students in a new venue. But I also admit to being somewhat of a perfectionist, still, after all these years. Maybe, like my American accent, I’m stuck with my attitude.

In any case, I believe this year’s crop of yoga therapy students had a good time. Any of my pre-course nerves were allayed when I dived into teaching and interacting with them.

One thing I’ve learned by now, after teaching in this particular course now for five years, is the importance of context.

What is context? I’ve heard it explained as the container that holds something – like the bowl that holds the fruit.

At the risk of being puffed up, I know a lot of stuff about the subject of yoga. In teaching yoga therapy to people who don’t have a lot of experience, I have to put all this knowledge through a funnel to give my audience the right amount of what’s useful. But, it’s the context that is most important element, i.e.: What is yoga? Why are we teaching the student or client the particular program we create? Who is this person anyway? What do we want to achieve together?

The truth is I’m still learning. Each time the teacher meets the student, the best thing that they can bring to the relationship is their presence. In that sense and to some extent, there will always be learning because, if student and teacher are in the moment, it’s a new exchange.

And perhaps that’s the very basis of a healing relationship.

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Gone Fishing….

fishing

Gone fishing…. No, not really. Not quite.

I’m heading north for a couple of days of teaching, and then a week of driving around in Queensland with Daniel. It’s his 65th birthday on Saturday and he deserves to be celebrated — perhaps by finding some undiscovered bit of paradise.

What’s different about this holiday is that we have not made a single booking or any real plans. Fraser Island is up there somewhere and we might visit it, or not, depending on the weather.

I can feel a big sigh of relief welling up with just the thought of empty time. It’s an exercise of will for me to not think of ways to fill it up.

I think I’ll be off line for a few days. We shall see :)

 

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Guts

guts

Am I a bad yoga teacher? Sometimes I think it’s just stupid to be teaching triangle pose to a student who has a physical complaint that’s causing them mental distress.

Sometimes I just want to say, Whoa, let’s just sit down for a minute and see what’s up. In this moment, what’s going on? Instead of glossing over what appears to be a strong feeling or a difficult attitude.

What’s the point of doing a lateral stretch when someone’s dog just died or they’re in pain in their body or they’ve been depressed for some time. Even if it’s an exceptionally well performed triangle pose, maybe it wasn’t be best thing in that moment. Maybe the student just needed to be held or to speak what was on their mind.

Is that capitulating? Would the perfectly executed triangle pose have indirect healing properties? Better than talking or touching? What would Mr. B.K.S. Iyengar do? Or, A.G. Mohan? Or, Shiva Rhea?

They might just trust their guts. Yes, I think that’s what they would do.

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Persistent, Pushy or Plucky?

Eve @ Burning Man Festival

Eve @ Burning Man Festival

Why do people try to keep it together? And, sometimes they have to work very hard at it, too.

I do it myself. I was reminiscing tonight about how I took up bicycle riding again eight months after I’d had hip replacement surgery. I hadn’t ridden a bike for 20 years. I was using the bike at the Burning Man Festival, covering miles of desert on and off over several days. After the first day out, by the time I returned to my tent, I broke down in tears from the effort of being tenacious (even after having fallen off the bike a few times).

I was thinking about this episode in relation to students who come to class with injuries and think or hope that the yoga asanas will help them. Maybe it will, but I’m not a medico or even a certified yoga therapist, so what I have to offer has limitations.

I don’t understand the mentality of toughing it out, even having said that I do it. I know that, even though I felt wrung out from my bicycling escapades, I also felt proud of myself for my courage and persistence.

Are any of these yoga attitudes? Are they even me? When does perseverance turn into pushiness? When does stick-to-it-ive-ness become stubbornness?

You teach what you most need to learn. - Old saying

 

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Yoga and Wet, Windy, Wintery Weather

windy weather

Like most people, we wanted real estate with a beautiful outlook. So, we had our home built on the top of a rise. We can see mountains to the west, wildlife in the forest, green pastures and distant water views.

What we also got as a result of being so elevated is full exposure to the blustery  wet winds that have been hammering Mitchells Island today.

I wouldn’t trade our magnificent outlook for the windless quiet of a sheltered dell. I love being able to see broad horizons and big skies. But, just at the moment, I’m mindful that this is the sort of weather that makes the transition from autumn to winter unpleasant, even unhealthy. It can weaken one’s immune system and lead to colds, coughs and flues.

In Chinese medicine, there are acupuncture points on the neck and shoulders which are called the wind gate points. These are supposedly entry points to muscles and joints where a cold chill can travel into your muscles. Exposed to boisterous wind conditions, you might end up with sharp neck pain and restricted movement, as well as cold symptoms like chills, headache and a runny nose.

My neck is pain-free so, happily, I can do headstand and shoulder stand. Some of the best poses for colds, sinusitis, and just generally for your immune system are inversions. Even if you’re not a fan of headstand, shoulder stand and plough poses, there are very good inverted substitutes: downward facing dog pose, wide-leg forward bend, supported (on bolster and blanket) bridge, and legs up the wall.

If you are high up on a windy hill like us, or even in one of those urban wind tunnels created by high rise buildings, be prepared.  For the winter, rug up, muffler up, and go head down, bum up.

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Do You Suffer from Yoga Teacher Burn-out?

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I led a workshop a while back for the Yoga Australia Association to address the issue of ‘yoga teacher burn-out’. It was an experiential session. We had an energetic discussion about how stressed teachers get in their lives and we tried to get to the bottom of why we behave in such a driven way at times.

While we didn’t get to any handy solutions, it made a difference to hear individuals talk about burn-out. It seems that when issues are out in the open, we’ve gone a good way to healing them.

I came up with a list of suggestions after talking to people, adding their tips to my ideas for ‘re-igniting the flame’ or better still keeping it from going out. Any long list can be daunting, so it’s probably going to be a lot more effective to implement just one suggestion over a week or so. Then, try another one.

  1. Do authentic yoga practice – that is, just for you, do practice that nourishes you.
  2. Enjoy a holi-hour. You may not have time for a holiday, but you can schedule an hour’s break, empty time, you-time.
  3. Stop the input for day or a weekend – no electronics, lights, sound.
  4. Practice gratitude.
  5. Breathe.
  6. When driving your car, listen to classic FM or pop or whatever gives you joy.
  7. Walk.
  8. Sing, join a choir.
  9. Shop for wholesome food, cook it yourself, and relish eating it.
  10. Be early for engagements.
  11. Do one thing just for you each day.
  12. Have a yoga mentor.
  13. Fraternise, mingle with your community, associate.
  14. Know your restorative poses and have them at your fingertips.
  15. Know your limits. Teach only as many classes as you enjoy. Set boundaries that are professional and compassionate. Learn to love the word “no”.
  16. Be a student. Follow DVD’s, read books, listen to podcasts, retreat.
  17. Try other styles.
  18. Create themes and curriculums for your classes to keep you and your students committed and interested: sutras, doshas, chakras, mudras, mantras, anatomy.
  19. Allow yourself regular time off. Create a schedule to take breaks periodically.
  20. Remind yourself why you’re teaching. What do you get from yoga? Share it with your students.
  21. Have yoga-free days. Cultivate other aspects of your life.
  22. Get plenty of sleep.
  23. Create or join a community of teachers and hang out regularly.
  24. Hydrate.
  25. Lighten up. Laugh.
  26. Practice vairagya – detachment.
  27. Get massaged, pampered. Find a bathhouse.
  28. Do yoga practice and teaching in different environments.
  29. Teach by candlelight.
  30. Journal. Write.
  31. Practice with others.
  32. Maintain ayurvedic balance.
  33. Think of mental flossing. Lighten your load and get rid of mental baggage.
  34. Tend to your important relationships. Gardens need watering.
  35. Have a regular date night or weekend with your significant other.
  36. Practice intimacy. Celebrate and acknowledge others and yourself.
  37. Practice yoga of the heart (Bhakti).
  38. Spend time in Nature.
  39. Create your own tips!

 

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